Check out my new 'World Reflections" Section
Interesting stories and anecdotes that reach into insights I have gained abroad.
Healing Grief, On-line Course, by Terry Douglas.
You are invited to participate in an 8-
week, on-line course, entitled
Healing Grief Page that captures a journey of healing following deep loss.
Listening
Posted on Wednesday, February 21st, 2007
A couple of days ago, I shared with a fellow an experience in India many years ago,
when my wife and I attended a Marriage Encounter Weekend, conducted by a dear friend
and Jesuit Missionary, Pepe Casasnovas, S.J.
During the weekend we learned a powerful tool in relationship development that we practised
for years. Briefly, it consists of selecting daily a topic related to one’s feelings, write on the
topic for ten minutes in the course of the day, and then come together later to share the results
for ten minutes. The process became known as the ten and ten.
I can recall Donna and I writing once about how we felt when it rained. Donna expressed how
she became depressed when it rained — understandable since she was raised in Bremerton, WA
where it always rained. (It was once said that people from Seattle didn’t tan, they rusted!)
Contrary to Donna, I feel exhilerated in the rain. As a young man I was on a rowing team and rain
indicated that we would be rowing on flat water — a delightful experience.
My point to this gentleman was that 10 and 10′s served to establish a line of communication between
partners in a committed relationship that served them both well especially when the subject to share
was more serious than falling rain on my head.
For those seeking to deepen your relationship with the other, I heartily recommend you investigate at
any age Marriage Encounter (www.wwme.org) for resources that might deepen your relationship skills.
I wrote the following poem after listening to a friend describe how their marriage of long standing had
evolved from the chaos evident when I first me them almost forty years ago to the quiet of skilled listening
in mutual respect and love. I hope you catch the drift.
How Do You Listen?
Years earlier they spoke
Loudly past each other –
Their hearing young.
Effortless back then
To create clamor,
Chaos with words,
Like an ascending wave in silence
That fills the horizon before shattering
Against the base of stone cliffs
Now still – together, a life time later,
No expression adequate to [...]
Praying Fingertips #2
Posted on Saturday, February 3rd, 2007
Some time ago, I mentioned my daily practise of reading scripture before dawn, reflecting upon the words, typing out a question, and then awaiting a response from the Holy Spirit. I want to share a second example of the fruit I receive daily to encourage you all to do the same.
“By this time it was late in the day, so his disciples came to him. This a remote place, they said, it’s already late. Send the people away so they can go to the surrounding countryside and villages and buy themselves something to eat. But he answered, “Give them something to eat.” Mark 6:35-37
“Prayer: Sometimes, I too feel it is too much trouble. I guess I am lazy. Give me, please, some insights to work with.
“Response: Jesus is always testing whether his students, you call them disciples, can swim across the pool. This is sort of a trite expression but remember I deal in water and its cleansing affect. He is never far off to ensure that they are not overwhelmed. So he allows them the chance to perform a miracle based on their faith alone, and of course with his assistance. They don’t do too well, but before you rush to judgment, when is the last time you performed a miracle? Do you know that I do not reserve miracles for a past that once again I must remind you is an illusion?
“So instead of getting it, they give back all the rational explanations about cost both in money and in bother. Yes, bother. They really want to be free of the five thousand and believe that they have tolerated the intrusion of their time alone with Jesus long enough. In fact to a man, they believe that they have been quite gracious sharing his presence.
“And you know what happened. Jesus doggedly and patiently instructs the disciples what they are to do. He not only satisfies the hunger of the five thousand, most of whom had not a clue as to what was occurring [...]
